Top Things I Hope NOT to Find Under My Tree in the Morning...
Here are some things that I hope I DON'T find under my tree in the morning... Don't get me wrong, I'm sure they're probably the perfect gift for someone on your list... just not me.
The IWJO (I Watch Joel Osteen) Lapel PinAgain,
- this is for real... "Show your support for Pastor Joel and spread the message of his ministry by wearing this beautiful pin. As non-believers ask their co-workers, friends and neighbors about the I W J O logo, it will give them the opportunity to learn about and receive Christ as their Savior through Pastor Joel's Ministry at Lakewood Church. (Excuse me... but I find it hard to find much of the salvation message many times when listening to Joel himself... This, to me, is really just a cheap knock-off of the Jerry Fawell "Jesus First" pin that I used to own... I think I'll pass on this one... please don't buy this for me this holiday season). Price: $4.95 + shipping/handling. (Car decals are also available.)
HOLY BIBLE: THE LIVING NEW TESTAMENT read Jan Crouch
Rev. Jimmy Swaggart Autographed/Autograph 8x10 Photo
New Gay and Lesbian Bible Combats Judgmental Christians and Mistranslation
"Deep in the shuddering guts of that religion known as Christianity is a rich and troubling history of persecution. Bullying. The singling-out those the Church professes to be Anti-God, such as Gay, Lesbian, Bi- sexual and Transgendered people. All built up from the foundation that is God's word, the Bible. Only it isn’’t. There is no Scriptural foundation for this persecution, no anti-gay passages in the Bible that the Church professes there are. There have been mistranslations. Check. Persecutions. Check. Bullying on the largest scale. Check. But none of this is set down in the Bible as God's way. Hence Smith and Stirling Publishing announces the release of a new and only LGBT Study Bible, "Study New Testament for Lesbian, Gay, Bi and Transgender: With Extensive Notes on Greek Word Meaning and Context." The translator is Dr A. Nyland, an ancient Greek language scholar and lexicographer..."
"Jesus Hates it When You Smoke" Ashtray Jesus,
- the Prince of Peace gazes balefully upwards at your approaching cigarette... How does that make you feel? 'JESUS HATES IT WHEN YOU SMOKE' reads the print inside this provocative, righteous ashtray. Sticker on bottom reads: "use of this product may be hazardous to your health and/or eternal soul". (This'd be a great soul-winning tool for those 'turn or burn' sign holders).
Eyes of Tammy Faye, A Poster on Ebay
Greatest Gift of All Santa and Baby Jesus Figurine